Personal Statement

“College has been very difficult, it takes such a toll on me mentally, emotionally and financially. I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up but I was good at math so I decided to just jump into a major not knowing what to expect, and now after four years I’m still here. I realize now that I don’t want to pursue a major in Science or Math, but the problem is I still don’t know what I do want. Why is this so hard, why isn’t there someone to tell us what we should want, why can’t I just have a sign…

I just don’t have a passion for anything anymore. There are things that I like and things I enjoy, but nothing really gets me up in the morning. I feel so hollow inside like it doesn’t matter what I do or where I go, it just doesn’t matter. I always want to be alone, I don’t find comfort in having friends over, they just aggravate me now. Why do I feel this way?

Now after a ton of paperwork I’m an Philosophy major, only because I hate it least out of all the other options. The only good news is I’ll be able to graduate this year if I take a full course load, along with taking a couple courses during the Summer, however I feel my plan is already losing momentum since I’m lacking motivation and the monetary backing of my financial aid. I just want to graduate already, make my family proud and prove to myself that I belong here, I’m tired of feeling like a fraud…. Sorry, I didn’t mean to get all personal on you, my bad” said Tommy, the straitjacket squeezing his arms into paste.

“No this is good Tommy, very very good, that’s what I am here for” the Psychiatrist started “now if you feel comfortable, you can keep going whenever you’re ready. Maybe, let’s talk about the incident in the library, for example, where did you get the knife-”

“No, I don’t want to talk about that!” snapped Tommy, his teeth grinding inside his mouth.

“That’s fine, we don’t need to talk about that right now” replied the Psychiatrist in a calming manner, “I know, let’s talk about Philosophy, why do you hate it least?”

Published by @babybearrudy

I like books, photography, and films. I'm always online!

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